Now, I'm not going to claim innocence in the topic I'm about to address. I have been in a bad mood over petty little things and have complained about things that don't really matter. I have a tendency to let my pet peeves get to me and sometimes I dislike people for doing those things. Sometimes I hate people, even though I try to love everyone. Lately though, I've had a reality check. I have not been the biggest fan of 2012, as I've said before. I've been dealt more than one bad hand this year. That thing that I've become a little more able to process and deal with, still is not something I want people to know about. My dad being diagnosed with cancer had been almost as difficult for me as if I had been diagnosed myself. The thing that I have always stated to be the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with has moved down to third place. So much of my mental capacity has been afflicted, but I've learned so much from these trials.
I have the ability to be both strong and weak. I have the power to persevere through anything, but I also have the vulnerability to fall apart. Luckily, I have some great friends to lean on. Individually, they may not always know the right thing to do or say, but that's why I have more than one friend. Strength is something I am constantly learning. It is about pressing on through the hard times and taking joy in the little things. I may feel like I am living in "A Series of Unfortunate Events," but there's a difference between unfortunate and the end of the world. I made a list of all the things that stress me out and try to deal with it all in time. I push myself to be happy. My current happy place is the Toledo Zoo. Besides that one little part, that was the happiest day that I've had all year. I was almost able to forget all my worries in the world and enjoy being with my friends. I know that not every day can be a good day, but the bad days do not have to continue on infinitely.
I do not begrudge the people that complain about things that are small. Well, I try not to. I realize that everyone is created by their own experience. Without experiencing some of the more difficult things in life, it is difficult to put things in perspective. I have a tendency to forget how trivial some things can be as well. In the past I have definitely taken things for granted and had people that have experienced worse react very poorly to it. I'm sure even now, I have people thinking that my life is not that bad. I've received a lot of feedback on how I should deal with things and everyone says something different. I take comfort in the fact that those that know the most about my life think I am doing the right thing, but those same people would be mad at me if I decided to take a different path. Point being, everyone can feel differently about the same situation. Sometimes, no matter how small a problem is, you need to let it out.
I was actually thinking about all this before I checked out Facebook today, though some reading this may think otherwise. I would like to address some things I read today though, and hope no one takes offense to it. One girl was talking about how the Monday of her spring break involves a simple hospital procedure and how it ruined her vacation. I wouldn't normally comment on something like that; I don't usually call people out in that form. However, the fact that I also spent the Monday of my spring break at the hospital, waiting to find out how severe my dad's cancer was, made me urge her to put things in perspective. In no way do I feel more entitled to complain than anyone else, but I think everyone can be an optimist. Another Facebook status, told people that they stop complaining about their lives on Facebook, which I do agree with partially. I agree that the status saying that everything sucks or just complaining about how terrible life is can be quite annoying, but I can understand how some look for support there. Once, I had a person who liked any sad or negative status I posted because he felt that my life was not nearly as bad as his and he wanted to teach me a lesson. I never want to do that. I refuse to post any drama on the site and have a habit of deleting those that do regularly from my news feed just to remove myself from the negativity. I think I'm done with my Facebook talk for now though.
Hopefully this very long post makes up for my inability to update since I have been back at school. It's much easier for me to blog in the morning, when my mind is fresh, but I don't often have time for that here. I'm hoping to update more on what I've been up to and how my family is doing on Saturday when I'm on my way to Grand Valley. For now, I'll say that all of my family is at home and well. A week from today I'll be in Atlanta with my siblings, so that's something to look forward to. Also, saw Jane Goodall yesterday, which was am amazing opportunity that I may talk about later. Right now, I'll leave you with this already lengthy post... it's bedtime.
I have the ability to be both strong and weak. I have the power to persevere through anything, but I also have the vulnerability to fall apart. Luckily, I have some great friends to lean on. Individually, they may not always know the right thing to do or say, but that's why I have more than one friend. Strength is something I am constantly learning. It is about pressing on through the hard times and taking joy in the little things. I may feel like I am living in "A Series of Unfortunate Events," but there's a difference between unfortunate and the end of the world. I made a list of all the things that stress me out and try to deal with it all in time. I push myself to be happy. My current happy place is the Toledo Zoo. Besides that one little part, that was the happiest day that I've had all year. I was almost able to forget all my worries in the world and enjoy being with my friends. I know that not every day can be a good day, but the bad days do not have to continue on infinitely.
I do not begrudge the people that complain about things that are small. Well, I try not to. I realize that everyone is created by their own experience. Without experiencing some of the more difficult things in life, it is difficult to put things in perspective. I have a tendency to forget how trivial some things can be as well. In the past I have definitely taken things for granted and had people that have experienced worse react very poorly to it. I'm sure even now, I have people thinking that my life is not that bad. I've received a lot of feedback on how I should deal with things and everyone says something different. I take comfort in the fact that those that know the most about my life think I am doing the right thing, but those same people would be mad at me if I decided to take a different path. Point being, everyone can feel differently about the same situation. Sometimes, no matter how small a problem is, you need to let it out.
I was actually thinking about all this before I checked out Facebook today, though some reading this may think otherwise. I would like to address some things I read today though, and hope no one takes offense to it. One girl was talking about how the Monday of her spring break involves a simple hospital procedure and how it ruined her vacation. I wouldn't normally comment on something like that; I don't usually call people out in that form. However, the fact that I also spent the Monday of my spring break at the hospital, waiting to find out how severe my dad's cancer was, made me urge her to put things in perspective. In no way do I feel more entitled to complain than anyone else, but I think everyone can be an optimist. Another Facebook status, told people that they stop complaining about their lives on Facebook, which I do agree with partially. I agree that the status saying that everything sucks or just complaining about how terrible life is can be quite annoying, but I can understand how some look for support there. Once, I had a person who liked any sad or negative status I posted because he felt that my life was not nearly as bad as his and he wanted to teach me a lesson. I never want to do that. I refuse to post any drama on the site and have a habit of deleting those that do regularly from my news feed just to remove myself from the negativity. I think I'm done with my Facebook talk for now though.
Hopefully this very long post makes up for my inability to update since I have been back at school. It's much easier for me to blog in the morning, when my mind is fresh, but I don't often have time for that here. I'm hoping to update more on what I've been up to and how my family is doing on Saturday when I'm on my way to Grand Valley. For now, I'll say that all of my family is at home and well. A week from today I'll be in Atlanta with my siblings, so that's something to look forward to. Also, saw Jane Goodall yesterday, which was am amazing opportunity that I may talk about later. Right now, I'll leave you with this already lengthy post... it's bedtime.
No comments:
Post a Comment